Auto Mechanic?

Heinz has a unique relationship with vehicles. Diesels are his favorite. They have to be standard transmission of course. ( I'm not sure why.) Right at this moment he is the only driver at home and has two very old VW's in his yard. Only one is running. The other is a truck. It's humungous and I personally hate it. Well, I hate all his cars. They all have idiosyncosies which make me crazy. His red diesel has over 400,000 kms on it and just passed another inspection.

What makes me crazy is that he spends more time working on his cars than he does driving them. He is super proud that they still run with that many km's on them, but fails to see the folly of spending all the money on parts. I swear he could have bought a new car by now with just the money he spent on parts. Never mind counting all the hours spent under the hood. Just recently he thought his grandson was whacky for wanting to let go of his car, which also has over 400,000 kms on it. He feels that as long as he is doing the repairs himself and keeps the car running he is saving money. So there is no talking sense to him on this issue.

 If you've ever been in any of his vehicles, you will undoubtably notice the strong smell of gas or diesel and if you go for a ride with him you will undoubtably suffer car sickness as a result. You see he keeps rags under the seat which he uses when he checks the oil dip stick or spills a bit of gas when he overfills the tank. One day I reached under the back seat of one of his vehicles to hand him a rag which he asked for and was confronted with one of my discarded panties. I had moved and left a bag of old clothes behind which were to go into the garbage. He had gone through the stuff to pick out "good rags". Needless to say I was incensed. I couldn't believe that I would find one of my panties under his seat to be used in public to wipe his hands on or the oil dip stick. I immediately disposed of it in the nearest garbage bin. I think I was disgusted for the rest of the day and told him I had better not find any more of my clothes used for rags.

He also has a penchant for driving on long hauls until he almost falls asleep. Then when he gasses up, he generally puts gas into the diesel car/truck or vice-versa. Driving from British Columbia to Ontario this usually happens to him somewhere along the trip and he then needs a tow and siphons off the gas or diesel which he then puts into gas cans, which he will buy, so as not to waste the fuel. This fuel is generally used for the lawn mower which now coughs regularly whilst he wonders why.